How do busy parents find time to rest if we can’t get enough sleep? By getting creative with these 7 Types of Rest to prevent burnout.

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Being a parent unlocks a new level of tired that I never thought possible.

We’re basically walking zombies.

My kids are now nine and five years old. Both sleep through the night (minus the occasional bad dream events).

But I think the worst part is that even though those first few years of sleepless nights and late-night, early-morning feedings are a thing of the past, you can never truly get it back or make up for it.

I’ll never “catch up” on the sleep that was lost.

On top of that, one of the many tiring things about parenting that I struggle to explain to the child-free population is this sense of always being “on.”

At all times throughout the day, your brain is taxed with the concern of another human.

I’m writing this while my two kids are in school, but there’s still brain power devoted to their wellbeing.

When we’re all home and cozying up on the couch, I’m still actively thinking about their needs and health. Even if it’s as small as wondering if they need their 27th snack of the day (real ones get that reference) or if they just need to hydrate more. Or wipe their butts a little better.

It’s nonstop.

And it could be leading to a whole host of issues.

Sleep deprivation and constant burnout leads to poor decision making, especially when it comes to your own health.

You are more likely to stuff your face hole with a bunch of processed (comfort) food when your brain is running on “E,” as opposed to making the healthier choice.

While we cannot make up for time lost, we can start to re-energize ourselves by applying better rest and relaxation techniques to our daily lives.

We tend to conflate resting with just sleeping. And if that was the case, we’d be screwed.

But, in reality, there are many different ways (seven actually) to incorporate more rest into our days that can help the burnout we’re all facing.

Today, you’re going to learn about the seven types of rest to prevent burnout and overcome that constant exhaustion that’s kicking your ass.

And you’ll learn a few ways to add these strategies into your lifestyle design so you can LevelUP.

Let’s get into it.

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A year ago, I hit a wall

Hustling and grinding and just always being plugged in and constantly working was my thing for years.

I had to work almost seven days per week at my first job in television since I was the only one in my sports department.

Switching to public relations and Corporate America jobs in a big fancy office (I worked in the Empire State Building for several years) led to a different kind of “always on,” but the same result: me working tirelessly and relentlessly while always being on my phone, answering email.

Giving up corporate jobs led to starting my own business, and any small business owner knows how exhausting it is to build a business.

But then came parenting on top of that, and not  just any parenting, staying at home as a parent to my infant daughter and then a few years later to my infant son.

For years I thought I was tired, but managing it all. Surviving.

But when you struggle to really grow the business things can end up spiraling, especially when the iteration of that business looked nothing like what you originally planned.

After several years of tough-to-come-by success in helping people, but not really helping myself, it finally all came to a head and by the end of a summer at home with the kids, I realized that I had enough.

I wanted to throw it all away. I was done.

My business was successful, but not as awesome as where I would’ve hoped.

Fatherhood was going well, but I was sluggish most of the time, short on patience, high on temper.

Life was just an endless blur of days bleeding into the next and being present was a mind trap of suck, so I avoided the moment by being glued to my phone and social media.

Luckily, I had enough awareness to recognize this was not the way to live. I needed to change directions.

Before I could do so, job number one was to slow down. And rest.

There are actually 7 types of rest to prevent burnout and exhaustion

The first thing you think of when I say “rest better” is to probably assume I’m addressing sleep.

Make no mistake, sleep is crucial. If you want to perform better, be more creative, less stressed, stronger, leaner and generally less of an asshole, then sleep must be a priority.

But all the restful and restorative sleep in the world might not be the total solution to solve your burnout.

In her book, Sacred Rest, psychologist Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith identified seven total ways in which your body, mind and soul can appreciate rest.

Patients would seek out her help to find a solution to prevent burnout. And over time, Dalton-Smith realized that it was not just a “one-size fits all” solution. She needed more context, similar to a triage in an E.R. There isn’t just one way to be burned out, just like there are many ways to be hurt or sick as she explained in an interview with The Guardian:

“I wanted people to take a more diagnostic approach to their fatigue. When someone comes in and they say they’re hurt, I can’t treat that without having more details: what hurts, where does it hurt, when does it hurt? … People would come in saying: ‘I’m tired all the time’, ‘I don’t have energy’ … lots of non-specific complaints. Nothing where you could give them a pill; things that needed lifestyle changes.”

Here are the seven types of rest that you need, according to Dalton-Smith:

Physical

This is your more traditional type of rest: Sleeping, lying down or even napping. But, it also includes things like gentle movement: slow walks, yoga or mobility.

Mental

Your brain is in a constant state of stimulation with screens and information. We make upwards of 30,000 decisions every single day and that can take a massive toll on our mental health in the form of decision fatigue and burnout. Mental relaxation is to step away from this nonstop noise.

Emotional

Do you bury your emotions so you can suck it up and power through the day? Eventually that catches up to you. Your body and mind are smarter than you and this will catch up to you in the form of burnout or illness. Take a respite to feel and express your emotions and step away from draining activities, news, events or even people.

Sensory

Your phone. Loud noises and blaring music. The smell of exhaust or even that office cubicle manufactured plastic odor. Bright lights and random screens. It’s an assault on your senses and your mind. Get away from the cluttered sensory overload to give your brain a rest.

Creative

Appreciate the beauty the world has to offer. It can be great food, music, art, you can go visit a park or take a walk through nature. Get away from the creative work you are paid to do and enjoy the work of other artists and creatives. Doing so can unlock more inspiration and creativity for yourself.

Social

Get away from toxic relationships and make time to enjoy life with your family, friends, even those coworkers that you can mostly tolerate. Commit to spending at least 15 minutes per day reconnecting with your network of loved ones.

Spiritual

This doesn’t necessarily have to be religious in nature, but certainly can be if that’s what you believe and practice. This kind of rest is simply about connecting to “something greater than yourself.” For me, that’s meditation and being involved as much as possible with the community where my kids attend school. For you, it might be prayer or volunteering.

Take a look through those seven types of rest again. 

Where do you think are lacking? What can be prioritized over the next few weeks?

How I use the 7 types to rest to prevent burnout

To help you out and perhaps give you some inspiration, I figured I’d share how I’m interpreting and approaching this process.

I’m not perfect.

Just like you, I’m still figuring it all out and making tons of mistakes along the way.

But, I do practice what I preach in terms of just starting small, going slow and trying to be consistent.

Here’s how that looks for me …

Physical:

For me, I realized that I was pushing myself a bit too hard with my strength training and decided that I need to incorporate much more active recovery into my daily and weekly routines.

So now, I take a full day of simply walking and mobility to balance the higher volume and intensity of my strength workout regime.

Mental:

I include my daily walks as both a physical and mental respite. But I also meditate daily and journal regularly.

Sensory:

A few times per day, I break from my creative work to sit on the floor and read. I like to read at least two books at once: Nonfiction to start my day and then I’ll lose myself in a good fiction story later in the day and before bed.

Emotional:

I’ve been working with a therapist for my anxiety and depression for years. This is where I allow myself to really “feel the feelings” and explore myself in deeper ways.

Spiritual:

Every morning when I return from my walk, I sit down and meditate for 10 minutes (if my Interns aren’t waking up super early to interrupt).

Social:

I explore this in three ways:

• First, I try to reach out to one person per day in a non-needy way, just like I laid out in my four pillars to reinvention.
• Second, I shut off my phone at dinner and stay present with my wife and Interns as we go around the table and talk about our days.
• Third, every year I plan a guys’ trip with my buddies from Florida to reconnect and just bust each others’ balls and have some fun.

Creative:

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve started to fall in love with reading even more. That’s the art form that I truly appreciate consuming at this moment.

But I also love taking my kids to the many museums and parks that New York City has to offer.

How you can use the 7 types of rest to prevent burnout and alleviate overwhelm

First you must start by cleaning up your sleep at night.

If you are not getting a solid 7-9 hours of sleep at minimum, you’re going to need to change that.

Best place to start is to come up with a bedtime and a wake up routine.

Work backwards from when you’d either like to, or need to, wake up in the morning.

Take into consideration that you should never let your kids be your alarm clock, so I highly advise getting up at least 15-20 minutes before they do to set your intentions for the day, take a few deep breaths and collect your thoughts, maybe even get one or two small lever-moving tasks done on your day (this can work-related, like writing … or health related, like my morning walks and mobility).

If you want to get up at 5:15 a.m. like I do, back-time your minimum amount of sleep to understand that you should probably be lights out in bed by about 10:00 p.m. (exactly like I do) at the latest.

Now you stick to this. Every single day. Yes, including weekends.

Be ruggedly consistent with this sleep situation to avoid throwing off your rhythm and your system (your brain).

Yes, humans are creatures of habit. The cliche is true.

When you deviate from that routine, your body and mind can be thrown off.

If you deviate from that routine regularly, your body and mind fight back in other ways (sleep deprivation, exhaustion, brain fog, fatigue, poor decision making).

Next, determine the types of rest where you are lacking the most and start figuring out the pockets of your day when you can prioritize each of those variations.

As always with everything I recommend and preach here on this website of knowledge bombing, start slow and start small.

It doesn’t take much to overhaul your life and habits by working in increments.

The key to being more active, productive, creative and happier is to rest better

Burnout is real. Especially if you are a working parent. Prioritize yourself by finding those little moments throughout your busy day where you can rest better.

A pocket to read here.

Take a moment to breathe there.

Find a few minutes to shut off the phone and screens and just be.

Engage in meaningful conversations with loved ones.

Stop beating yourself up with endless HIIT and exhaustive workouts and do some stretching.

Treat yourself like a high performance “athlete” does. Pro athletes rest in between plays, periods, halves, quarters and in the offseason.

You are not any different. It’s an athletic endeavor to parent, work and still try to stay in shape while surviving everyday life.

As a result, you need a break. So take one (or actually … take seven breaks).

I hope you enjoyed this newsletter. As always, if you have any questions, please feel free to reach out.

If you’re interested in working with me to get a complete body transformation program that couples minimalist training with a personalized approach to nutrition (no calorie counting here), then you should check out my Lean4Life Coaching Program.

I answer all of my emails at pete [at] petecataldo [.] com … Hit me up with the subject line “the 7 types of rest to prevent burnout” and I’ll answer any questions you have to make this work for you.

Until next time,
Pete