Midlife doesn’t have to mean crisis. It can be the beginning of a new and exciting chapter. Here’s how to make an epic midlife comeback.

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All of my life, I felt like I’ve been running against a clock. Like this imaginary deadline that I had to hit in order to be successful or something.

But that existential dread really accelerated somewhere at the age of 43.

I felt like I was running out of time.

My career no longer inspired me. The parenting grind left me completely burned out.

The simple idea of wanting to change was overwhelming.

What the hell would I do to change anyway?

The stakes feel higher as you get older. Any little change (especially financially) could lead to ruin.

It was like I missed some window to start over.

If you’re feeling stuck like this, that midlife is more of a dead end than a fresh start, you’ve come to the right place.

You are not alone, my friend.

This experience you’re going through is the classic case of what society calls a “midlife crisis.”

If we follow the stupid midlife crisis trope, we’re supposed to go buy a fancy sports car or have an affair with a hunky barista or wander Middle Asia like Kaine from Kung Fu or something.

I reject that narrative. You should, too.

Midlife is not a crisis, my friend. It’s a calling. An awakening.

It’s time for you to step into a new role, to plot your midlife comeback and to made the choice that this will be your own Renaissance Era.

Here’s the plan to make it happen.

Let’s get into it.

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We grew up thinking 40 was old

The TV dads of TGIF were all in their 40s. Hell, our parents were in their 40s after all.

We were sold the myth that life peaks in your 20s and 30s.

Taught to see midlife as the halfway mark that signifies the best of our life is behind us.

That by the time we’d hit our 40s, we were supposed to settle for stability, accept the grind, and live for the weekends. We’d have our family with 2.5 kids, a two-car garage and a dog in a nice suburban neighborhood.

And maybe by your 40s, you actually did achieve this.

It’s nice.

Comfortable.

Boring.

One day you wake up on the other side of 40 and realize that you want more. You’re trapped in a job you’ve outgrown. Stuck practicing habits and routines that no longer serve you.

You have a finite amount of time left in your life and there’s a bit of a panic to try and “seize the day” to make the absolute most out of the time you have left.

That’s that imaginary deadline messing with you, too, my friend.

But … you are not behind.

And you have more time left in the game of life than you think.

Midlife is your greatest opportunity

The average 40 year old still has 36 years of life left to live.

If you settle now, you are missing out on a massive opportunity to redesign a better life for yourself and make your future self fucking proud.

• Vera Want didn’t even start her career in fashion until her 40s.
• Stan Lee didn’t see comic book success until 39.
• Tom Brady left the Patriots after two decades of dominance, signed with Tampa and won Super Bowl MVP at the age of 43.

And you’re out here thinking life is a wrap for the next 30+ years?

Don’t view this as starting over.

Brady didn’t “start over.”

He still knew how to throw a spiral and break down a Cover-2 Defense.

“Life really does begin at forty. Up until then, you are just doing research.”

– Carl Jung

Pause and think about all of the research you’ve completed in four decades worth of life:

• Skills you’ve developed.
• Stories you can tell.
• Struggles you’ve survived and learned from.

Take your experiences and your new “out of effs to give” approach to life and make those your superpowers for personal growth.

Here’s how to start your midlife comeback

Now is your time.

Get into the best shape of your life; start that business; write that book; switch careers; travel; put the phone away and read more.

It starts by mapping out your midlife comeback playbook.

Block out 10-20 minutes in your calendar. Schedule it.

If you don’t schedule it, you’ll find every excuse under the sun to ignore this step.

Reflect.

Write down everything you’ve learned about yourself over the last 10-15, maybe even 20 years.

Get clear on your strengths.

Your values.

The biggest wins you’ve achieved.

Struggles you’ve overcome.

This serves not only for motivation. But as your own troubleshooting guide for the future. You know you’ve overcome similar challenges and have a playbook to do it again.

Reimagine.

Start mapping out your desired lifestyle.

This won’t change overnight. It’s a long-term goal to achieve. So get creative. But also, be realistic.

Winning the lottery or being injected with super serum like Capt. America ain’t a realistic goal. Sorry, not sorry.

Instead, map out what the ideal day would look like if nothing held you back.

Get specific.

Start from the time you wake up … through your ideal working day … family time … bedtime.

And do not skip carving out time for you and your health.

Minimalist workouts are a fantastic way to get in shape in minimal time, too.

I know a guy who can help you with that.

Realign.

Map out your weaknesses.

If you’re feeling the suck of midlife crisis, then chances are you are misaligned and unfulfilled in one of these five areas:

1) Career:

Is it your employer? Your office? The career in general?

2) Health:

Are you in decent enough shape? Do you need to commit to a better workout regime or fix your nutrition?

3) Improvement:

When was the last time you acquired knowledge that had nothing to do with your career?

Our brains need stimulation, we need to challenge ourselves to expand our knowledge and learn things (it can be for your career or just for the hell of it).

4) Social connections:

How long ago was it that you hung out with your buddies or your girlfriends?

Is it time to get something on the calendar?

5) Entertainment:

Are you spending more time optimizing every single weekend for your kids instead of checking in on your own enjoyment?

You don’t have to play video games like me, but you need to do something.

Pick an area that needs the most work.

One area.

This isn’t about a total sea-change like the stereotypical midlife crisis fixer that overhauls their life. One small habit at a time.

So pick one area and commit to some small change that moves you closer to your overall vision that you just imagined.

Reconnect.

You’re not alone in this journey.

But it can feel lonely here.

I’ve realized that outgrown friends at this age is common.

I continue to read, seek out new cultures and learn new things. While also discovering that so many of my buddies from my small town where I grew up are undercultured and undertraveled.

Seek out a community of people that have similar goals and interests and values.

Which is why I’m building my own community that I’m calling “Midlife Mastery” for those of us after the age of 40 ready to Level Up our lives to find that fulfillment that’s been lacking.

More on this in a future newsletter.

Reinvention doesn’t happen overnight.

But every small step builds momentum.

Imagine where you’ll be in one year’s time if you focused and committed to making one small change every single day.

Midlife isn’t the end. It’s the crossroads.

You have the choice to either settle for the narrative that we’re washed up and ready to settle.

Or you can make it your Life’s Work to step into this new role for yourself.

No, it won’t be easy.

Yes, you are tired.

Stressed. Overextended. Overworked. Burned the fuck out.

But, what’s the alternative? Seriously. What’s the alternative?

At what point are you going to realize that the entire purpose of life is to figure it out.

And if you don’t like your current situation and need more out of life … It’s time to start figuring out why and how you’re going to rewrite your story.

You can keep walking the path you’ve been on.

Or you can choose to pivot toward something more meaningful, more fulfilling, and more you.

The adventure begins now.

I hope you found this useful. If so, I’d appreciate it if you sent this newsletter to one person you think would benefit from my writing today.

And if you’re new here and enjoyed this newsletter, I’d be honored if you subscribed for more at this link.

And as always, if you have any questions, please feel free to reach out.

I answer all of my emails at pete [at] petecataldo [.] com … Hit me up with the subject line “midlife comeback” and I’ll answer any questions you have to make this work for you.

Until next time,
Pete